tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7668050648919046122.post2435103082498244570..comments2023-10-20T07:13:22.206-04:00Comments on Waiting for Happy: Half of my heart is in Heaven...boltefamilyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09178547489939649432noreply@blogger.comBlogger18125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7668050648919046122.post-60574446018978893932008-04-01T12:30:00.000-04:002008-04-01T12:30:00.000-04:00When I say "you" I don't mean you personally... I ...When I say "you" I don't mean you personally... I mean when others say "you have to leave it between you and God" it seems like an easy answer...<BR/>but then again, perhaps my husband is right and I have issues with trusting God...<BR/>LVAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7668050648919046122.post-654300036451535882008-04-01T11:48:00.000-04:002008-04-01T11:48:00.000-04:00Hi Krtisy,I emailed you a few weeks ago but never ...Hi Krtisy,<BR/>I emailed you a few weeks ago but never received a reply...<BR/>3 months ago we lost our daughter to a genetic disease. She was our fourth child, the second one to pass away. For 8 intense weeks we cared for her at home and held her in our arms when she passed away. Our other daughter (our second child) passed away 4 years ago at 10 weeks. She spent that time in the hospital because we didn't know what was wrong with her, and she passed away just before the doctors diagnosed her. We also have had two healthy daughters, who are 6 and 3 now.<BR/>I really relate to what you write... half of my heart, half of our daughters, are in Heaven and I struggle with many of the same things you do...even with wanting to wear a sign(I've thought of that, too!) I was also struck by your blog about the desire to have more children but having to take so much more into consideration. To say that it is "between you and God" is not really true...so many others are affected if our baby happens to be the one in four with the disease. Our families, other children, church, friends, etc...are all affected by our decision. <BR/> I appreciate your blog because I have stopped writing in mine, only because it is difficult for me to put my pain into words... so to read yours is comforting- I'm not alone! I'm thankful for "finding" you and feeling that connection.<BR/>I will keep you in my prayers.<BR/>LVAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7668050648919046122.post-72841874377254594152008-04-01T10:41:00.000-04:002008-04-01T10:41:00.000-04:00What a beautiful heart you have. Tears come as I ...What a beautiful heart you have. Tears come as I read your words-so honest. My heart breaks for you and your sweet family. I think the way you describe your feelings must be completely normal. You amaze me. I am sorry you are without your Isaac and Asher. I pray for comfort for you all. I know God has great plans for the Bolte family-it is so exciting to watch and see them unfold.<BR/>KimKimhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04074627004747114194noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7668050648919046122.post-7326516434742222102008-04-01T10:01:00.000-04:002008-04-01T10:01:00.000-04:00Kristy,I commented as "anonymous" one comment befo...Kristy,<BR/><BR/>I commented as "anonymous" one comment before Carolyn in MD, and I just read her comment this morning (see, I told you I I check in on you every day). I want to second her suggestion about finding a group. I attend an infant and pregnancy loss support group at my church (although we have members from several other denominations), and it has been a Godsend - a sanity-saver for me. I joined about a year and a half after I lost my baby girl (which was about a year and a half too late!), as it was getting started. But most of our women have come to us within weeks or months of their loss. Just because our husbands have ended up grieving differently (and because of childcare needs), we have turned out to be a group of just women, but I think the concept is the same. These women have become some of my best friends. As I mentioned, my baby died four years ago, and no one thinks it odd at all that I am still grieving. We meet to remember our babies, talk about things we are feeling, say things exactly like "we wish we could tell everyone, be nice to me, my baby died!", and generally talk about our babies. You are right, after the first few weeks, or if you are lucky (isn't that a terrible use of the word!), people stop wanting to talk about our babies we have lost. But my group wants to talk about my baby girl even more than they want to talk about my live daughter sometimes!! And yes, I know my baby is safe is heaven and playing (or maybe watching out for) all or your babies, but I still miss her and grieve.<BR/>You continue to be in my thoughts and prayers,<BR/>ShellieAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7668050648919046122.post-49316661780534568522008-04-01T07:35:00.000-04:002008-04-01T07:35:00.000-04:00Dear Kristy,"Be nice to me, my baby died" It is s...Dear Kristy,<BR/>"Be nice to me, my baby died" It is sad that our culture expects people to "get over" a death of a loved one in a few weeks or at least a few months! There are a few cultures where people where a particular piece of clothing or color to signify that they have experienced the death of a loved one. They wear that for a year! Even strangers on the street will comment how sorry they are for the person's loss and give the person a little more grace in the every day things. I think we should do that in our culture.<BR/>If your church does not have a GriefShare group, I encourage you and your husband to find one in your area. You can go to www.griefshare.org and type in your zipcode to find the closest group. It is solidly Biblically based and it would encourage your hearts. You can also sign up for an e-mail devotional for grieving people.<BR/>-- Carolyn in MD who continues to grieve with you and pray for you and your family.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7668050648919046122.post-89259674734693282842008-04-01T02:05:00.000-04:002008-04-01T02:05:00.000-04:00I've read for months and only commented twice, but...I've read for months and only commented twice, but I just wanted you to know that yes, five weeks later, I am still reading. And I suspect I will be reading for a long time. I lost my baby girl four years ago, and for a variety of reasons, my grief was delayed, so I am still working through some of it even now. <BR/>I know there are so many people thinking of and praying for you - my hope will be that they remember to reach out and communicate their continuing thoughts with notes, emails, or calls in the coming months.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7668050648919046122.post-17178534957012878352008-04-01T00:27:00.000-04:002008-04-01T00:27:00.000-04:00Loving you and praying for you....Loving you and praying for you....Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7668050648919046122.post-40561222266595412542008-04-01T00:06:00.000-04:002008-04-01T00:06:00.000-04:00I check your blog daily to see how you are healing...I check your blog daily to see how you are healing. I read your entry and thought of "FootPrints". <BR/><BR/>You might not be able to go back to the old "normal", but take comfort in picking a whole new "normal".<BR/><BR/>Remember to have FAITH and keep your heart open.<BR/><BR/>-AAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7668050648919046122.post-62113102547170582372008-03-31T23:40:00.000-04:002008-03-31T23:40:00.000-04:00Sweet Kristy,I am thinking of you tonight and feel...Sweet Kristy,<BR/>I am thinking of you tonight and feel what you are feeling, but we are doing it - we are living this nightmare out and still loving our God and trying to find ways to give him Glory. He is with us every step of the way even when we feel so alone. I am praying for God's healing for your heart, I am praying that all your needs and wants will be met. You are a blessing I am so thankful for your willingness to share yourself and your family with us.<BR/>With love and prayers,<BR/>KimKim (marygracesummons.blogspot.com)https://www.blogger.com/profile/14368553087650841135noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7668050648919046122.post-36134178427743815792008-03-31T22:02:00.000-04:002008-03-31T22:02:00.000-04:00Kristy,I know you don't know who I am but I go to ...Kristy,<BR/>I know you don't know who I am but I go to your church and I listened to you during the True Human Stories... The situation you and your family are in reminds me so incredibly much of my own family. When I was 3 I would have had a little brother, Blake Andrew. He died in the womb and at that age I didn't understand what was going on at all, just that my mom and dad were very sad. Then, when I was in 4th grade my mom got pregnant again but she miscarried once more. That was my last chance at having one more younger sibling. These events affect me now more than ever. I still haven't exactly come to terms with why I don't have 2 little brothers instead of just 1. There are so many questions I have for God when I get to heaven but I'm just going to have to be patient until I can talk to Him face to face someday. I don't understand why He did this to us, but apparently it wasn't in His plan for my parents to have 3 children and that's ok. I know He has a reason for that. I may only be 17 but it worries me that I may go through the same type of things later in my life. If nothing else, just please know that you and your family are not alone! I kind of understand what you are going through, at least from a siserly point of view. Just keep going to God for eveything...He won't put you through anything you can't handle. Much love and God Bless!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7668050648919046122.post-61971371259973229902008-03-31T21:58:00.000-04:002008-03-31T21:58:00.000-04:00Tonight I am praying that you will FEEL yourself i...Tonight I am praying that you will FEEL yourself in the palm of his hand. That you will feel cradled in love, and that Asher and Isaac will send you down a tiny glimer of the joy they are experiencing. You will never feel like the same person...because you aren't the same person. Embrace that person! You forever will be a better person, a better mom, a more devout christian....because of those two special little boys in heaven. You are NOT alone! Just keep going...one foot in front of the other. <BR/>:) <BR/>-KatieAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7668050648919046122.post-49597256341355134612008-03-31T21:37:00.000-04:002008-03-31T21:37:00.000-04:00Kristy,I just want to tell you that you ARE exactl...Kristy,<BR/><BR/>I just want to tell you that you ARE exactly what God wants you to be right now. He knows your pain and He does not expect any more from you than you are able to give right now. You have done what He has asked of you, carrying two of the most loved and special babies here on earth, and then handed them back to Him. He knew He could trust you Kristy, no matter how much it broke your heart. Your heart is His and it is not always easy to follow Him, but you did. You can trust Him to lead you to the new normal that is to come. I am praying for your marriage to hold strong as you grieve each in your own way. I am praying for you as a family of six that the Lord leads you all through this valley into His light. Just do what you can each day and nothing more until you can catch your breath. You are so loved by me and you are in my prayers daily.<BR/><BR/>Love, Laurie in Ca.Laurie in Ca.https://www.blogger.com/profile/15599832324966859946noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7668050648919046122.post-51908047398828597312008-03-31T21:12:00.000-04:002008-03-31T21:12:00.000-04:00I am another who has continued to read your blog e...I am another who has continued to read your blog every day. I also rarely leave comments but I lift you and your family up in prayer daily. I have never lost as greatly as you have, but I have experienced loss. In my experience, the hardest part came months after their death. After the funerals are over, and people stop calling, leaving food, sending cards, etc. it seems that life is supposed to go on as normal, except that it will never be "normal" for you again. Now you have to learn to live life without that person and that is when it really starts to hurt. Know that many people are still lifting you up in prayer. You and your boys have left an imprint on so many hearts--you will not be easily forgotten!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7668050648919046122.post-31827682236284059662008-03-31T20:37:00.000-04:002008-03-31T20:37:00.000-04:00Praying for you always...... Meredith/Orlando FLPraying for you always...... <BR/>Meredith/Orlando FLMeredithhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01823536931064606166noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7668050648919046122.post-45110482576082918102008-03-31T17:45:00.000-04:002008-03-31T17:45:00.000-04:00I wont pretend to know what your pain is like, all...I wont pretend to know what your pain is like, all I know is my own struggles. I have mental battles in the grocery store too, watching all the prople who dont know me, seeing the babys. I too am trying to be the best of what God intends for me to be, and it seems most of the time I fail. As long as we keep trying, and keep loving God, that is what matters.<BR/>Praying for youAnxious AFhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10911308224630696808noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7668050648919046122.post-71516892611638813252008-03-31T17:05:00.000-04:002008-03-31T17:05:00.000-04:00I am praying for you today.I am praying for you today.alanehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17740498791453763901noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7668050648919046122.post-61165058055102940182008-03-31T16:19:00.000-04:002008-03-31T16:19:00.000-04:00I have followed your blog for many months now, and...I have followed your blog for many months now, and although I never usually comment, I thought I should let you know that I check in here daily (sometimes multiple times) and I am still grieving with you even though I never had the honor of meeting your precious Asher...or Isaac.<BR/><BR/>I will join you today in your prayer to feel God presence....<BR/><BR/>Many prayers and thoughts with you today and always....Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7668050648919046122.post-87440162647515569822008-03-31T16:08:00.000-04:002008-03-31T16:08:00.000-04:00Please accept my congrats on the birth of your bea...Please accept my congrats on the birth of your beautiful son and also my deepest sympathy in your loss. I am glad that you are able to express yourself here. Please hang there.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com