We all make them, right? We want to be thinner, eat healthier, spend less, save more, yadda yadda yadda. This week has been a tough week for me. There has been some intense stirring going on in my heart and I am quite certain God is working on me and though I have to admit it frightens me a little, I am also excited, because I know His plans for me are good!
I have spent some time reflecting on the past year and what I hope for the future and I have to say that we have been immensely blessed in 2010. We have had our struggles but He has brought us through each and every one a little stronger, a little more refined and a little more focused on Him. I have to say, He has our attention. I spent a lot of time praying in 2010 for Him to draw near, for a hunger for him. In the days I carried Asher, His presence was tangible. I could feel his hand upon me and I cannot even describe the peace that came with his presence. I had missed it so much and was honestly a little afraid that the only way to feel it was to suffer so intensely. I have to say that in the past several months I have had a deeper hunger and thirst for His Word and His presence. I had no idea just praying for it could bring it. ;)
We have spent 2010 teaching our kids and learning from them. We have seen growth as individuals and as a family. Our love for God has intensified as has our desire to do His will. We have stepped out of our comfort zone and loved more deeply, given more, and forgiven more freely. Words can't even begin to tell you how each and every time we have acted in obedience, the Lord has returned to us an incredible blessing that leaves us gasping for air.
It is my hope that in the coming year that we can use our time to glorify Him even more. That we can be His hands and feet and get out there and do the things He would have us do. We want to give our whole lives to him, not in part, the whole thing. Our time is no longer our own. When we chose to give our lives to Him that meant ALL of it. My intention this year is to live with such intentionality that He can be seen in and through me. I resolve to wake up each morning (early) and give it all over to Him each and every day, I pray to keep an open heart so that I can go wherever he leads, even when it seems nuts and even when I don't want to.
"LORD, remind me how brief my time on earth will be. Remind me that my days are numbered-how fleeting my life is. Psalm 39:4
I want to live my life focused on Heaven and not on this earth. I want my time here to reflect Him. I want my kids to see how amazing life is when He is given the trust and honor He so fully deserves. I want them to know the JOY of giving, even when it makes thing very uncomfortable. I want them to know that He will ALWAYS provide for their needs even when all hope seems lost.
I have a feeling this coming year is going to hold some big things for the Boltes as we follow hard after Him. I am sure it will be a year of ups and downs, highs and lows and grief and joy. I know he will push us to our limits and grow us a little more, I pray we are able to love even more, give even more and seek Him in all we do. I pray that our lives are a reflection of Him. I don't know if we will be thinner or if we will exercise more, but I know we are here and we are feeling a stirring in our hearts, He is calling and we are wrapping our minds around what it is he is asking and praying for his guidance. Stay tuned...he isn't done with us yet. ;)
Job 42:2 "I know that you can do all things; no plan of yours can be thwarted."