It has been a crazy week here. I feel like we are walking on sacred ground. So many things happening and God is in them all. A very dear family is losing the matriarch they hold dear and we have been honored to come alongside them and enter in to their grief and comfort them with the comfort we've been so blessed to receive from the Lord through many others. It has been a week of tears and laughs and memories and I am so very thankful that our family has had the opportunity to be a small part of the journey. God is so very present and near bringing a peace that only He can bring and I am overwhelmingly thankful.
I also found out yesterday that all of your prayers for Jacob are working! God is so near to him. He is doing GREAT! He is becoming a social little guy and loves to be held and snuggled (oh how I cannot WAIT to get to do those things) he is eating and growing and just doing so great all around. I am waiting for a call today with some more information and am hoping for an estimated discharge date!
I am finding myself so conflicted over all of this. God has been so present and has provided each need so far and I know He will continue. We are almost 3/4 of the way to having all the money we will need to cover the adoption expenses. He has been in EVERY detail. Some day soon I will sit down and write in more detail about how He has orchestrated EVERY single detail. For now I am feeling a bittersweet excitement.
I cannot wait to hear them tell me that he is ready for discharge, and fly out to get him and introduce him to the family and community who loves him and wants him so much, but my heart breaks knowing how much his biological mother loves him. She REALLY does. This is so hard for her. I know the heartache of losing a baby and I don't want that for anyone so while I am so excited for our family to get to love and raise Jacob, I also am well aware of how difficult this is for her and am trying to find a balance. I pray for her and for Jacob each day and I can see Him working in the whole situation and I am just so grateful!
It looks as though VERY soon there will be another sweet little guy in this little house, we are busy nesting and preparing for his arrival and trying to take huge leaps of faith knowing God has got this whole thing. It is tough for me to prepare for a baby before they are really in our home, but last night as Howard and I were talking he reminded me that God wants us to be excited...we take nothing for granted...but it is okay to hope and dream and wash some baby clothes and be over the moon excited at the gift of his sweet life and his sweet mom. So keep up the prayers! Big things are happening! I will keep you posted!
Oh my WORD I cannot wait to snuggle this guy!
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