Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Discouraged (warning...this is just me whining!)


Thanks for all of your encouragement and for listening to my whining. All issues from yesterday have been resolved. The bank was great about reversing the charges and all babysitter/vehicle issues are taken care of for the moment. Praising God for the little things tonight! Today has been a good day! Thank you for your prayers!

I don't know if seasonal affective disorder is hitting early in our home or what but the best word I can use to describe the last 24 hours is struggle. I feel like even the simplest of things these days are a huge struggle for me and I am tired of struggling.

We are still getting by on one vehicle, which has been fine, but this week we have quite a bit going on. I have a doctor appointment the kids have doctor appointments, and I have Bible Study. So that means babysitters and borrowing vehicles three days this week. I thought I had everything lined up for the week, and my plans came crashing in yesterday and I am scrambling to find a way to get through the week. I discussed options with Howard last night and found myself simply discouraged by it all. There is no easy answer. It just seems that such simple things should not be so difficult. I am content to stay home with the boys all day every day, really I am, but this week it is not a possibility. We need to get these things done.

So this morning as I was working on ironing some of those details out I decided to sit down to do my banking only to find SIX yes SIX overdraft charges on my account. Now I will admit that since February I have been a bit more lax about this stuff, but I still keep GOOD record of my account so I was stunned. We have really been struggling financially, and I know that these fees will kill our budget so I have been overly cautious. Well, the banks are closed today so I cannot go and get it resolved and it is driving me nuts. I spoke to a national representative from my bank this morning and she said that what happened was that on Saturday I deposited a check and wrote our mortgage and the mortgage check was cashed before the check I deposited was credited. I was unaware that this would be an issue as I handed them the deposit first. They both happened on the same day, they just chose to cash my check before depositing the other! ACK! It adds up to about 200 dollars in charges. So I have to wait until tomorrow to go in and see if they can reverse the charges this one time. I am hoping they will. I just hate having this looming over me.

I know I am whining and complaining and I don't blame you a bit if you don't read a word of this. It just feels like nothing can ever be easy for us. Nothing EVER goes smoothly. I feel like I can never be at rest because I am always averting the next disaster. I feel targeted and am really struggling with God. We are working it out but there is much I just cannot understand. I mean He could certainly cut us a bit of a break somewhere. I guess I am just tired.


Melanie said...

urgh Kristy! I feel for you! Sometimes people are such morons (I know, not the most Christ-like response, but truly...) It's frustrating on top of everything else.
We did the one car thing for 7 months (John JUST got his car last week!). As long as I never go anywhere, not a problem, but with dr appts, errands, etc...
If you need something, please ask!
Hang in there! Love, MELANIE

Anonymous said...

Kristy- I want you to know, I am serious, you are not alone in this. I am currently feeling like we are not getting anywhere, my husband has been off work for several months because of an injury and know his factory is closing that he works at, both my children have been sick, other family members have been ill. I just wonder is it ever going to stop. It is said that God will never give you more than you can handle, but swhoo, I am on overload. I will pray for you and your family, if you will pray for us. Take care!

Michelle said...

Kristy, It is good to have an outlet to vent! I am praying for God to show favor on you tomorrow with the bank. Hang in there!

Anxious AF said...

Thinking of you today my friend.

Chelle said...

I understand you stress...praying for you! may try to see if I can get an email to you later.

Anonymous said...

Guess we have the same bullseye on us!!!! ((HUGS))

Unknown said...

Hey, just wanted to stop in and say - I read what you wrote and I totally understand the issues! We too are running on one vehicle, the only way I get places is by making all my trips out when my sister goes. And I TOTALLY would have thought the money was in the account and written that check! Hopefully they'll reverse those charges!

Praying for you! Hang in there!

Corie said...

Wish we were closer. You could use my car anyday! Praying for you today and as details are ironed out for everything! I pray for peace, comfort and direction.

Anonymous said...

I am so glad you wrote this post. We too are struggling financially and have had similar issues. I online bill pay and a few months back, I paid our mortgage payment with Bank of America to our credit card (also with Bank of America). This in turn made our mortgage payment late and we didn’t have the money to come up with a whole new payment…I was literally on the floor crying. How could I have been so stupid? Luckily the BOA people were very nice and fixed the issue. However last month, I did what you did and a $7.00 check went through before our two paychecks (over $2000) and it cost me two overdraft fees! I spent $70 for $9.00 worth of stuff…the people at our bank didn’t even care, so we are leaving them. I also hate how they cash the largest amounts first, so they can maximize your overdraft fees…how come they get the bailout!!! UGH!!

Emily said...

Hold fast to John 10:10. It is the enemy that comes to steal, kill, and destroy. Jesus came that we may have life and have it to the full. On days like these (which I have seen SO many of) it's hard to remember, but you know what you know. Fix your eyes on Jesus. It's all you can do when the pressure mounts like this and there are waves all around. Tomorrow's a new day and you will be provided for. He's working in ways you cannot see!

And since I'm sure your tired of my cliches by now, I'll just go ahead and say that I agree with you! This SUCKS. :)

But the truth remains. Keep seeking.

Jessica said...

I read through bits and pieces of your blog to catch up with your story.

I am so very sorry for both of your losses. We lost a child in June, so I know your pain. very deep. All 4 of your boys are beautiful. Oh, and I have a son named Luke also!

my3sons said...

You are entitled to vent! I have heard of banks doing things in that order to purposely charge the fee. It is certainly worth trying to reverse. You and your family have had their fair share of heartache for sure. I always wonder why God seems to target a few families to go through such hard times. You look at the things that you have endured and wonder how He can let these things keep happening. All we can guess is that He has a reason. Don't you just wish you know what that was? I do sometimes! Take care of yourelf!

Melissa said...

Aww! I would hope the bank would let the fees go, just this once! I would be frustrated too (especially since today is a bank holiday). I like things fixed as soon as possible too. Hope and pray that your week gets better!

Michelle said...

Oh, no! I hope this can get resolved!
Most banks I have dealt with have a policy of always crediting the account with the deposit before posting charges.
It is so hard dealing with such things while grieving. My heart goes out to you!
{Hugs} and {prayers} headed your way!

Anonymous said...

Hi Kristy,

I've been reading your blog for awhile, but we haven't met. I found it through a friend's. Your family and all of your beautiful sons are constantly in my prayers.

Your post tonight *really* resonated with me as I also just overdrew my account by accidentally paying a bill out of the wrong checking account. My mind was not where it should be! I was able to have them remove most of the charges-- I hope you have luck with that, too!

And I hope that tomorrow is better.

Liz in Michigan

Erika said...

Sending you huge hugs. I don't understand why life has to be so hard, either. HUGS.

Kim (marygracesummons.blogspot.com) said...

Girl whine on!! Sometimes the little things are just too much. I know....I'll be praying for all the little details to work itself out!!
Love you friend,

Chris and Emily said...

Hey - please don't apologize for feeling like you do. It's all just part of it - I think your honesty and willingness to share it and recognize it honors God.
I am praying for you that you will be able to feel some peace and easiness.

Beth said...

I hear you! I am praying for you as you struggle through this...I don't think it's whining, just honesty. I pray that you would feel the promise of God when He says he will never leave you or forsake you.

mom2LEAA said...

I have followed your blog for some time, but never commented before. I too have felt like our family has been through enough and just want God to cut us a break. From birth defects to multiple surgeries on our daughter to financial despair due to medical bills to illness in my spouse, I have often wanted to shout to God, I can't handle this anymore.

As for the bank, I can totally relate. We to live week to week and once the bank decided to put through our mortgage, but not the deposit we had made. 800, yes 800 dollars worth of overdrawn charges in 24 hours. We did not have that money to loose. We fought and got some of the money back, but not all of it, needless to say, we changed banks after that.

There are still days that I wonder how I will handle all that life hands me. I still question God giving me so much, but I try to remember a quote from Mother Theresa, " I know that God won't give me more than I can handle, sometimes I just wish he didn't trust me so much."

Please know that many of us have felt the way that you are feeling and know that we pray for peace to fill your heart.