Thrifty Thursday

Since many of you have written with questions about our new budgeting and quest to get debt free, I have decided to continue with the Thrifty Thursday Posts. I am also working on getting a new blog up and running that will chronicle our thrifty ideas and plans to become debt free more in detail as I am not sure that is the direction I want this blog to go, yet I am excited so many of you have shared ideas with me and are interested in doing the same thing!

Today I headed out with a few coupons to do a little shopping...I always limit myself when I am taking a child or children as it IS tougher with the kids to balance coupons, finding the right items, working out scenarios and keeping kids from wrecking the place.

I first stopped at Rite Aid. They were out of a few things I had stopped by for, but was able to get the Stayfree Maxi Pads. I got 4 packages for FREE! They are buy one get one free this week and I had a BOGO coupon...making both packs free! I had two coupons so I got four packs!! I also got a Crest Pro Health toothpaste on sale for 2.99 with a 2.99 rebate. I used a 1.00 coupon for Crest and a 1.00 Up+ reward and paid .99 out of pocket and will get 2.99 back! I made 2.00! :)

Then I headed to Giant Eagle. I have written before that I cloth diaper. I do. 95% of the time. We recently took a little trip and I used disposables and we have a few overnighters planned in the next couple of months and I have not figured out the "traveling with cloth diapers" thing out yet so I wanted to stock up. I prefer to use ONLY Chlorine free diapers that list the ingredients in the diaper on the package, so that leaves us with Seventh Generation diapers. They can be pricey! They run 10.99 for a jumbo pack of 35 size 3 diapers.

Giant Eagle is running a deal now and if you have a child in diapers and a Giant Eagle nearby, run to your nearest store for this deal! It is AWESOME! When you buy 2 packs of Seventh Generation Chlorine Free wipes, for 7.00 you get a FREE jumbo pack of Seventh Generation Diapers! That is 7.00 for two packs of wipes and one pack of diapers, which is a good deal, but it is made better when you use coupons. Go HERE and print each coupon twice. After coupons today I got 3 packs of diapers and 6 packs of wipes (ALL CHLORINE FREE) for a whopping 12 dollars! YAY!

What are your favorite deal seeking sites or deals for the week?

We're Still Here

Hello dear blog friends!

I am so sorry for my recent absence, but life is a whirlwind right now. We got back from a quick trip to celebrate "Miller Grace Days" with Emily and her awesome family and have finished t-ball and are dealing currently with health issues!

Here is an example of how life is tonight:

Hope began to break out in hives from her antibiotic for her ear infection, so I called the doctor. He said to discontinue using the antibiotic and get her some Benadryl and call in the morning for a new prescription. (how do I not be terrified now of all antibiotics?).

The kids were in their PJ's but we figured we would all climb in the car and go get Hope's meds. I run into the store grab the Benadryl, and while I am cashing out the woman says, "Ma'am, I think you should wait here. There was just a tornado spotted nearby and the sirens are sounding." (I have been in a tornado and have issues with severe weather) I run outside to find my family waiting in the van totally unaware. I panic, and have Howard pull in to the nearest fast food restaurant, take all three kids in Pjs and slippers into the restaurant, seat them in a corner, void of windows, and order them a snack to wait out the storm.

The storm ends, we come home, get kids into bed, and Ben wakes up SCREAMING. He, I believe has a UTI! SERIOUSLY!? NOW another storm is coming. We are feeling very under attack and would appreciate your prayers.

If You Have a Minute or Twenty

I couldn't have written the story God weaved better than Emily. Please take a minute and go read the story of a Divine Appointment. Have a wonderful weekend!

Just as a Reminder

Sometimes I am still surprised that even years into a grief journey, just when things are beginning to feel normal, just when you think your heart couldn't hold another ounce of joy, it hits, a shocking wave of grief that can bring you to your knees in an instant.

We had kind of settled in here at the Bolte house, Hope is beginning to sleep and be a little more content to sit on the floor next to me while the boys help with household tasks. My house is beginning to reappear from under the piles of clutter and laundry, as I once again find my rhythm.

And yet, just the other night, grief gripped my heart so tightly that I could barely breathe. I am not sure if it is the fact that "typically" at this point in life, where things begin to ease up and the demands of a newborn are behind us, we are blessed with a new life and my body is invaded again for another nine months, and the fact that that is just not going to happen again, or if it is the fact that Isaac's birthday is next, he will be five this July.

In case you missed it, we do birthdays BIG in the Bolte house...here we have "birthday week". A week of fun designated for celebrating the ones we cherish most on this earth. We know all too well that we are never guaranteed a tomorrow and that we should cherish today and we do our best to celebrate each blessing the Lord has bestowed upon us.

I sit and wonder, what Isaac would look like at five years old. He and Luke are our two NON redheads. I wonder if he would look like Luke. I bet he and Luke would be best buds. I wonder what type of cake he would like, would it be white like his big brothers? Would it be chocolate like mama and Hope? Or, would he prefer a cheeseburger like his daddy? Would he want transformer decorations, or Hotwheels? What would his wishlist look like?

Sometimes I drive myself nuts with this stuff. I KNOW that Isaac will celebrate his fifth birthday in the most perfect place, just as he has the four birthdays prior to this and just as he will for eternity. Yet I can't help but wonder what my Isaac would be like. A mom is supposed to know her kid, I was robbed of that. Six days is not long enough, especially when you are so deep in shock that you can't see straight.

I went to bed that night teary, Howard asked what was up. I told him I was sad. He gets it. He just held me and let me cry. Sometimes a wave of grief engulfs me like a tidal wave when I least expect it. I have learned to allow myself the time to be sad instead of trying to push it away. We have to walk through it, we can't skip over it or it will bounce right back and throw us under the current again.

In a way it felt good to be sad for a while. Sometimes I think we need that reminder of where we have been so that we can embrace the grief and move forward. There is nothing wrong with revisiting your grief, but I am learning I just can't reside there. My life would not be the same if it weren't for Isaac and Asher. I would not be the same mother, wife, daughter, sister, or woman. They have forever changed me and I don't want to ever forget that. There is something sacred about revisiting the sorrow of losing something so dear, we just have to embrace it and move forward with the blessings before us. I would give just about anything to hold my boys just one more time, but I can't allow myself to miss out on the blessings of my living children because I am so deep in grief. Learning the balance is tricky and I am still trying to figure it all out.

Luke is out of school for summer, Howard will finish up this week (but will be working a summer job) and we have a lot of fun little things planned for our summer. As we enter July, the days we held and let go of our Isaac, if you think of us, please pray. Pray for our hearts, pray for balance, and pray that we always see the blessings the Lord has put directly in front of us even as we continue to grieve.

If you are also walking this grief tightrope, how do you balance it all?

Melt My Heart

Today my grandpa picked us up to take us to lunch and shared a milkshake with Hope! :) It was so sweet! As you can see, she LOVED it and did NOT want to give it back!

What A Difference A Year Makes

Hope and Birthday Lamby
One Week Old

Hope and Birthday Lamby
One Month Old

Hope and Birthday Lamby
2 Months Old

Hope and Birthday Lamby
3 Months Old

Hope and Birthday Lamby
4 Months Old

Hope and Birthday Lamby
5 Months Old

Hope and Birthday Lamby
6 Months Old

Hope and Lamby
7 Months Old

Hope and Lamby
8 Months Old

Hope and Lamby
9 Months Old

Hope and Lamby
10 Months Old

Hope and Lamby
11 Months Old

Hope and Lamby
12 Months Old

Well, folks, there you have it. Hope Amelia is officially a year old. At 2:22 pm one year ago this baby girl made her debut. Little did we know in the coming days we would go on to find out she had a very rare skin disorder called Epidermolysis Bullosa. At that time her future was so uncertain. Here we stand a year later praising God with every breath that Hope is thriving and growing. She is a miracle and I just know her brothers in Heaven are beaming down at her just as her brothers here do. She is a very loved girl for sure. Please don't think that for one moment I take all of the prayers you all have offered on her behalf lightly. I stand in awe of the Lord and of the body of Christ as you all have rallied around us.

Here is what Miss Hope is up to these days:

She weighs in at just over 17 pounds and is wearing 9-12 month clothes comfortably

She DESPISES putting her feet in grass or sand

She also despises water, be it pools, baths or the lake

She is still a VERY picky eater and prefers to nurse

She has developed a new love of baby dolls (which mommy also loves)

She also loves balls and trucks

She can stand on her own very well and tried to take a step just yesterday.

She says: bye bye, hi, no, yeah, thank you (ku ku), baby (beebee), snack (nack), duck, Ben, Mama, Dada, fish (shish), pretty (pitty) when she sees a flower, ball, uh-oh, shoe, see, what's that?

She STILL prefers mommy to anyone else, but is beginning to warm up to Grandpa Bolte

She loves to clap and cheer at Luke's tball games

She still does NOT sleep through the night (it happened ONCE, it was a fluke)

She LOVES books

She astounds us each and every day. I look at her and when I think of all God has done in her in the past year I am awestruck. I am humbled and grateful that He chose US to be her family. She is one special girl and we just love her to pieces!

We had a VERY busy weekend and day today. I will share more about all of that and pictures ASAP. Tonight I need some rest! :)

Guess Who is Having a Birthday Party TOMORROW?!

Thrifty Thursday

So I had promised a couple of weeks ago to share money saving tips with you all on Thursdays, and since then we started tball, graduated from kindergarten, got the stomach flu, and are preparing for a FIRST birthday party. All and all it is a whirlwind and I wouldn't trade a minute of it, okay, maybe the stomach flu, but she sure was cuddly for those couple of days! ;)

Anyway, I thought while I had a moment between laundry loads, I would share a few more tips with you all. We have actually been able to cut our grocery bill to 30 dollars a week. :) So I have been doing well on our goal of 40 per week!

1. I clip coupons! I know, I was once one of those, UGH! I don't have time for that kind of ladies, but man it really is like holding a job. I save as much as I would make if I were working a lot of weeks. If you like a brand or a companies product...jot them an email and let them know...odds are they will send you a coupon or two and they are typically high value. I also follow blogs such as Faithful Provisions, The Thrifty Mama, Hip2Save and For the Mommas, these help me match up the coupons I clip to the best deals and get things for next to nothing or for free...Seriously, I cannot tell you the last time I paid for something like shampoo, shaving cream, razors, toothbrushes, toothpaste, dish soap, etc. If I clip coupons and shop Rite Aid, I can often make money on these items! My general rule is, if I don't have a coupon, I don't buy it! :)

2. We plant a huge garden and can and freeze. We typically spend about 50 dollars a year on seeds, and gardening supplies, this includes my canning lids. I have really surprised myself with this new found love of canning and freezing as well as gardening. I used to wonder why on earth people did these types of things. It saves us a ton of money and I love knowing that we do all of our gardening organically and that my kids are not eating pesticides. This year we planted the following : tomatoes (LOTS), red peppers, green peppers, and banana peppers, peas, green beans, squash, zucchini, cucumbers, corn, spinach, cabbage, broccoli, strawberries, watermelon, cantaloupe, pumpkins, onions, garlic, oregano, cilantro, basil, parsley, mint, and eggplant. ( I am sure I am leaving something out) We have also added two blueberry bushes, two pear trees, and two nectarine trees as well as several grape vines in the past year or two, but they have yet to produce just yet) We only own about an acre of land so it can all be done in very little space if planned out well.

3. Cloth Diapering. Another thing I SWORE I would never in a million years do, and yet I love! We have just in the past month gone from using disposables at night and when on the go to being 100% cloth! I love knowing that Hope has NO chemicals against her skin and that we are not filling the landfill with diapers that take over 500 years to break down! Well, if I am being honest...Howard loves the environmental thing more, I love that they are cute most! :) Cloth diapering is NOTHING like I had imagined it would be. It is not gross or terribly time consuming and has already saved us a BUNDLE! The money I invested in Hope's newborn diapers, I was able to make 80 percent of that back by reselling them! Now she will be in the set she is in until potty training!

4. We drink water, tea, coffee and milk. I typically do not buy juice or other beverages, they are typically expensive and add only empty calories to our diets. We get our fruit nutrients from fruit so that we also benefit from the fiber and skip the juices. My kids are drinkers and it would be easy to go through a lot of juice which would fill them up not leaving room for other foods. SO they have gotten accustomed to drinking water, milk (at meals) or tea.

5. I have begun making our own breads. Not just loaves of bread, but also bagels, hot dog buns, etc. I make it all from scratch and it costs pennies compared to supermarket prices.

SO there you have it...a few more tips...I will share more next Thursday as I have a birthday party to plan now! :)

Tears

This week has been a tearful one for me. Howard and I decided it was time to clear out this house and have a HUGE yardsale, so we have been working each day on clearing out the unneeded stuff in this tiny house and at first I was excited and as I began the work, I could not believe how difficult it really was. Tears fell like rain all week. I have been a complete mess.

As I would open a box to go through it, depending on it's contents, it was like reopening an old wound. Random photos or cards amidst other things would bring tears of joy, tears of sorrow, tears of gratitude, tears of longing. The toughest part by far was going through the baby stuff. Howard and I have decided that unless God leads otherwise, we are done having children biologically. I have had five babies in six years and when Hope was born, the doctor saw a "window" in my uterus and suggested I at the least wait a few years before thinking of doing it again. Not to mention the brain issues Isaac and Asher had compounded by Isaac and Hope having EB. Suffice it to say, we are just not prepared to walk that road again, but if the Lord calls we will walk wherever He leads. We fully intend to adopt or foster one day. The cost of adoption though has our heads spinning and wondering if that is really an option.

That said, if He leads us down the path of having a baby again, whether it is through birth, adoption or foster care we know He will also provide the means and all of the necessities at that time. God had really placed it on my heart to dig through the baby stuff and get it into the hands of families who NEED it NOW! So I have been working hard going through things and finding families who would be blessed with it.

For some reason going through this baby stuff is hard. It is grief work. I am grieving a loss. And I never expected it to be like this. It is just STUFF and I am really not a STUFF kind of person. I had several meltdowns as I was sorting and felt so completely stupid for having such a hard time getting rid of STUFF! I am a sentimental gal, and when I would look at an outfit I would have memories of the kids wearing those outfits. I wasn't really attached to the outfit, just the memory that has gone with it. I have tried hard to breathe deeply and take in each moment, committing it to memory, because I know full well that sometimes tomorrow doesn't come.

My heart was so heavy all week. I am SO thankful for each of my five kids, I know well that there are many moms out there who will never get to hold ONE of their children, let alone FIVE miracles. I know how blessed I am, and yet this is just not how I pictured it. I imagined a house FULL of babies, I imagined rooms FULL of bunkbeds, not side by side cemetery plots in the baby section of the cemetery. I have three happy, healthy, busy children in this home and joy abounds, yet there is always something, someone(s), missing. I have two boys in Heaven who will never know pain and are right where they were meant to be. I will not see them play tball, or graduate from Kindergarten. I do not know if they would prefer Superman or Batman ( a fiercely debated topic in our home). It stings. As a mom, we want to know our children, we are the ones who know them best, and I was robbed of that. It is a hard pill to swallow.

THEN, this morning I woke up and my sweet mother in law took Ben for a while. I sat here just thoroughly enjoying Hope (the yardsale has been put off due to rain) we played and sang, we snuggled and I nursed her and rocked her to sleep all the while, tears ran down my face. My heart was so overflowing with gratitude and joy, that I thought my chest might burst. I still look at her each day and can't believe she is mine, the Lord trusted her to ME.

After I put her down for her nap I went back and looked at my first post after her birth. I was so scared. Scared doesn't even touch it, I was terrified. Her skin was blistering, we were headed to take our two day old baby to have a biopsy done, we were given the worst case scenario and we were just clinging to His promise that He had it all under control. We sure didn't.

I read through ALL of the comments that day and was again touched by the massive amount of people who have been praying for our family. I feel completely unworthy, yet am so thankful. As I read through the prayers for Hope, each. and. every. one. had been answered. She thrives and is completely healthy. I don't take that lightly. Not for one minute do I want to take for granted what the Lord has blessed us with. He has given, he has taken away, he has given, and taken away and yet through it all His love shines through so brightly I can barely see at times. My heart is forever broken, I guess it had to be. I mean all the joy that is in this heart needs that outlet so it doesn't explode! :) Once again, sorrowful, yet rejoicing! :)

4Rather, as servants of God we commend ourselves in every way: in great endurance; in troubles, hardships and distresses; 5in beatings, imprisonments and riots; in hard work, sleepless nights and hunger; 6in purity, understanding, patience and kindness; in the Holy Spirit and in sincere love; 7in truthful speech and in the power of God; with weapons of righteousness in the right hand and in the left; 8through glory and dishonor, bad report and good report; genuine, yet regarded as impostors; 9known, yet regarded as unknown; dying, and yet we live on; beaten, and yet not killed; 10sorrowful, yet always rejoicing; poor, yet making many rich; having nothing, and yet possessing everything. 2 Corinthians 6:4-10

We're Goin' to the Zoo

Luke and Ben with two of Luke's buddies

Hope actually rode in the stroller! I usually wear her, but it was rainy and I thought the stroller might be better...it was! :)

Checkin' out the tiger

Scavenger hunt paper

Big brother helping his sister put on her rainboots