Asher's Birthday Weekend

I had a really hard time the week leading up to Asher's birthday, but I have to say that though I still wish he were here for his birthday, the weekend was blessed.



Friday I was still struggling a bit and I was cleaning the house like a mad woman. I looked into the living room where Luke and Ben were playing and saw them jumping on the couch. Just as I got the words "Boys, please use the couch for sitting and not jumping, someone is going to get hur..." out of my mouth I hear that sickening thud followed by Benjamin wailing. I ran to him and picked him up. He had jumped and hit his head on the TV stand. He immediately had a golf ball sized goose egg and bruise. I got some ice and dialed the pediatrician. I spoke with a nurse who said that most likely as long as he didn't lose consciousness and wasn't vomiting he would be just fine. She had me check his pupils and a few other things and gave me a list of concussion signs to observe him for for the next 48 hours. She said if anything changed or I felt uneasy just to bring him in. He seemed fine and was playing fifteen minutes later.



We continued to watch him for "signs of concussion". I basically sat watching him the rest of the day and didn't get another thing done. I was terrified to leave his side. Sometimes I swear that God gave us Ben to keep us on our toes and grounded. We can never become too consumed with grief or anything else for that matter :-) . He is such a blessing. Anyway, that night we took the boys to Disney on Ice. Benjamin has this crazy Mickey Mouse obsession and it was so much fun watching him watch the characters dancing on the ice. It actually brought me to tears a few times seeing how excited both boys were. We got home late and tucked both sleepy boys in bed so that we could discuss what we would do for Asher's birthday. I wasn't sure what my heart could handle and I felt God nudging me to celebrate Asher and the beautiful family He has given me, not the one I wish I had. He has given me two amazing boys in Heaven and two here on earth and we needed to celebrate Asher as the family we are.



We came up with pretty much nothing and decided just to go to bed. Then in the morning we decided to look into a few options we had been tossing around and to make a long story short a great friend made reservations for us at a local hotel with a pool. We headed to that hotel Saturday afternoon. We got there, settled in and got the kids ready to head to the pool, we had such a great time as a family swimming, eating pizza in bed and watching movies. The boys kept saying that "Asher's birthday was the most fun birthday ever!" They were so exhausted from swimming that they immediately fell asleep in their bed which gave Howard and I some time to just be together and watch movies and snack. It was so nice and so relaxing. We had nothing to focus on except eachother and it was really great. (aside from the part where I had to call Poison Control for Ben because he got into a roll of TUMS while I was getting my PJs on. Can't leave that kid for thirty seconds! :-))

Sunday we decided not to go to church. I was really struggling and I knew it would be too much for me. So many people that love us so much and I was just a gushy mess so I knew I would just bawl with every hug and warm wish. So we slept in, took another dip in the pool and then headed to a favorite pizza joint to meet a few friends for lunch. It was nice to have some good pizza with good friends and have a little birthday cake! Then we headed home for a rest and then had some other great friends over for dinner and cake. We also sent some blankies into the NICU of the hospital where Asher was born in his memory. (Thanks Lisa for making those for us)It was fun and so special to know that so many were thinking of our boy and continue to think of him.

We were not able to do a balloon release as we wanted to do, because it was a blizzard that day and anyone who has tried to release a balloon in the snow knows that as the snow collects on the balloon it sinks...we didn't think it would be very uplifting to take balloons out and watch them go up and then dive back to earth. :-)

I have to say that Sunday was not as hard as I had anticipated...truly the week leading up was much worse for me. But I guess that is true with most things...the anticipation is often worse than the actual event. Asher's birthday was perfect, we were surrounded by those who love us and love him. I have been so overwhelmed by the compassion shown to us over the past week. We have received many comments, emails, calls, cards, gifts and we cannot even begin to express our thanks. God was truly present and working through so many of you and words cannot even begin to show the gratitude we feel for the grace that has been extended to us.

The kind of cool thing is that the cards and notes are still straggling in. Over the past week or so each time I visit the mailbox I get a sweet surprise from someone else who has been touched by our Happy boy. :-)


I do have lots of pictures, but cannot seem to find that darn cord that attaches my camera to my computer so I will update the post as soon as I find it with the photos of the day! :)