Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Thinking of my boys in Heaven

Photos that take my breath away...

I should be up right now feeding you sweet boy, but instead in my own desperate attempt to parent you in some way I sit here staring at your photos trying so hard to remember what it felt like to hold you, and snuggle you. I miss you so much it makes it hard to breathe some days. Nighttime is always the worst because everyone else is in bed and I sit here longing to hear you cry just once so that I could run to feed you. We miss you son, but we know that where you are you will never have to feel this anguish and for that we are grateful! Give your big brother Isaac a kiss for us! We love you both and will be with you again someday!

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God, Please help me tonight, my heart is in pieces longing for my boys. I am so thankful for all you have blessed me with, but sometimes I wonder if you didn't trust all of this to the wrong person. I know you don't make mistakes though so please, I am asking for your grace. I am asking for your comfort and I am asking for your strength. I know the only way I can do any of this is with you! Please help me be the mommy you made me to be to all of my boys. I am not ready to be done with this. Help me raise Luke and Ben to have a heart for you and shine your light wherever they go. Help me give Isaac and Asher a voice and help others to see the gift that lies within each and every life. Help me to be the wife and helper Howard needs. I thank you for each of my blessings Lord, they are many.


Anonymous said...

Gorgeous pictures, gorgeous boys, show them off all the time! God chose the right person because He knew that you would turn to Him with the perfect prayer you wrote last night and He will help you and your boys will inspire prayer from so many!


The VW's said...

What a beautiful and heart-felt prayer to our Lord! He hears you and He does not make mistakes! He will give you all that you need to continue on your very important journey as a wonderful mother to 4 amazing boys! Prayers continue for you and your family! God Bless You!

Laurie said...

Praying that precious prayer right along with you Kristy. God did not make a mistake in choosing you, your heart belongs to Him and He is bringing you through. I love the pictures of Isaac and Asher, they could be twins. Praying for you sweet friend and wonderful mom to 4 amazing boys. Praying for joy and hope to fill your heart up today and in the days ahead.

Love, Laurie in Ca.

valerie said...

What a beautiful prayer from a loving mother and wife! God hears your prayers and knows your heart, Kristy! Keep going to Him!